Film reviews in 10 tweets or less – The Take, Pride and Prejudice and Zombies and Doctor Strange

This feature appears on this blog much less than I would like, but I feel like I don’t tweet as much anymore… Anyway, here’s the last few movies that I decided to live tweet! I promise that I’m usually much funnier on Twitter, so you should totes follow me!

The Take

A young con artist and former CIA agent embark on an anti-terrorist mission in France.

While most people were out on New Year’s Eve partying or whatever it is that people do on New Year’s Eve, I went to my parents house where I set up and then lost custody of my Netflix account and my brother lent us his Amazon Prime account, we watched a few episodes of the Crown then turned to Amazon Prime and well, my mother and I are big fans of Idris Elba, so much so she ended up kicking over her wine in excitement, so we thought we’d give this a go. And so began the live tweeting!

If you don’t know the story of this movie, it was initially called Bastille Day and was due for release a few days after Bastille Day last year… Only then the Bastille Day attack happened and as this is a film about French terrorists, the name was changed to The Take. It’s not the greatest movie ever made and why all the English actors had to be American I’m not entirely sure, but it was fun and it meant I got to spend New Year with Idris Elba, so…

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies

 Five sisters in 19th century England must cope with the pressures to marry while protecting themselves from a growing population of zombies.

It is a truth universally acknowledged that most things are made better with the addition of zombies, this however, I’m not so sure! I read the book several years ago and had been waiting for the movie to come to Netflix, now finally it is here and well… what better thing to do on a Saturday than to watch some zombies attack Lizzie Bennett.

Doctor Strange

While on a journey of physical and spiritual healing, a brilliant neurosurgeon is drawn into the world of the mystic arts.

Considering I am usually a big fan Marvel studios, I was initially put off watching this because of the minor white washing. I have a problem with that. Anyway, one of my colleagues had the blu ray and lent it to me, so here are some thoughts tweeted during the watching.

The after credits scene got me a bit excited ngl.
If any of ya’ll have seen these and want to discuss further – to the comment section we go!

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Film Reviews in 10 Tweets or less: Tropic Thunder, Cockneys vs Zombies and Drive Me Crazy

I know, I started this series and then last posted about it in February. I am the very definition of commitment-phobe. Anywho, even though I started listing the films I watch each month in my monthly round ups, occasionally I still live tweet my thoughts while watching them… So, you lucky people, here we go!

Tropic Thunder

220px-tropic_thunder_ver3Through a series of freak occurrences, a group of actors shooting a big-budget war movie are forced to become the soldiers they are portraying.

I remember the DVD of this being released while I was in my second year of uni and my house mate was going through a severe Robert Downey jr phase and I was convinced I would hate this movie. How wrong I was!
For some reason I had a craving to watch it again recently and decided to tweet some of my favourite lines from the movie… Sorry.

17th September

i don’t drop character til after i done the dvd commentary

the first time I watched this was in my second year uni flat with and she drew me a picture of Twigman for my wall of stuff

what do you mean you people? What do YOU mean, you people?!

you ma ma ma make me happy. Why don’t people quote this movie? It’s genius!

i’m a dude playing a dude disguised as another dude!

WHO IN CRIKEY F*** IS HALFSQUAT?!?!

i need to watch Tropic Thunder more often!

Basically, if you haven’t watched this movie, you need to, it is silly af, but so, so, so funny and if you watch it with a friend, the inside jokes will be well worth it!

Cockneys vs Zombies

cockneys-vs-zombies-dvd-001 A gang of bank robbers fight their way out of a zombie-infested London.

First thing you need to know about me, I have cockney in my genes. Second, I miss a good old bit of rhyming slang and regularly drop it into conversation, partly to confuse and partly to amuse. Either way, the subtle language of the cockney is dying out and we must preseve it. Thirdly, this was so bad it was bordering on genius.

23rd September

Attempting to cover the blue streak in my hair for good while watching cockneys vs zombies. I am prepared for much hilarity

Bricktop off Snatch is in this!!

what this film needs is an appearance from danny dyer.

omg the old people vs zombies is the best idea ever! “No good he’s mutton Jeff!” I miss rhyming slang

 omg. legit incredible.

Drive Me Crazy

p23056_p_v8_aa A high school girl must find a substitute date to escort her to the prom.

Ok, so Sophie talked about this film in her podcast forever ago and I was like, I vaguely remember that from childhood but… Whatever, then  I saw it pop up on Netflix and I was like, you know what, let’s give it a go and well, it was so cheesey I felt my lactose intolerance flaring up, but it was an enjoyable enough way to spend an evening. Also I decided to tell Twitter about it too.

17th October

After hearing talk about Drive Me Crazy I am finally watching it!

i dont believe any of these people are in school

is Nicole blind? She clearly hasnt noticed she lives next door to the most beautiful people I’ve ever seen!

OMG CHASE LOOKS LIKE HARRY STYLES WITH HIS MAKE OVER

is that mario lopez!?

how did i not predict this outcome?

wait what… are they like step siblings now? I’m so confused!

What a wild ride that was!
Tune in again at some random point in the future where I will live tweet a movie which will make no sense to a single one of my followers!

Film reviews in 10 tweets or less: Spooks, This Means War and Locke!

This was a thing I started a while ago. No one told me not to do it again. So, I’m doing it again.
We started off with:

Spooks: The Greater Good

downloadWhen a terrorist escapes custody during a routine handover, Will Holloway must team with disgraced MI5 Intelligence Chief Harry Pearce to track him down before an imminent terrorist attack on London.

I’ll be honest with you, while I was into Spooks the series when it first began, I didn’t really have an awful lot of time for the later seasons and the last one, set before this film, I didn’t watch at all… So, I barely remembered any of the characters (I’m told most of them weren’t in this film anyway) and I have no recollection of Kit Harrington being in the series… Though that might just be because I didn’t know Jon Snow back then… Anyway, I was lent this by a work colleague and I took to Twitter, but did I rant or did I rave?

October 27th
Tonight’s entertainment of choice is Spooks: The Greater Good. I literally recognise EVERYONE.
like i dont think there is a british actor that ISNT in this scene
watching this film makes me want to work for MI6. Can someone make that happen?
RUN JON SNOW RUN.
He’s in spooks btw.
Hearing Kit Harrington with a london accent is so weird
Seriously MI6 having multiple black vans drive around a car park is not at all inconspicuous.
YOU CANT JUST PUT A GUN IN THE BIN JON SNOW.
I can’t look at Tim McInnery without thinking of Stephen Fry yelling DARLING.
This film is literally how to outspy a spy.

In conclusion, though the film was alright, it was literally just alright. There weren’t any big explosions or anything of any real excitement going on. It was fun, if a little weird, to see Kit Harrington run around London in a hoodie though.

This Means War

war

Two top CIA operatives wage an epic battle against one another after they discover they are dating the same woman.

I knew without even needing to watch this that it would be all kinds of terrible, but I was hoping that it would be one of those films that was so bad it was good. I’ll be honest, I bought it mostly because it was only £3 and I thought, well… For £3 I will get to look at both Chris Pine and Tom Hardy for an hour and a half, so… Why not!
Seriously though, this film came out like three years ago… Why the hell didn’t I watch it then? If you haven’t seen this film, there will be spoilers below. Sorry. (The DVD is great though because it has three alternate endings and they were all waaaaay better than the actual ending.)

8th November
Right, I am going to watch This Means War whilst attempting my next 5,000 words.
This film is awful and i love it already.
How did an english person get a job with the cia cos i’ve tried and they said i had to be american
(this is true and maybe one day I’ll tell that story)
Chris Pine lives in the world’s perviest house and t hardz is short af.
omg i ship it already.
Chris Pine you’re a creep and you need to step off T Hardz girl.
Reese better not choose either of these two. Seriously.
That film was great. I’d have chosen T Hardz though. Soz Chris.

You know when you watch a film and you know its terrible,but you love it anyway? Yes. That is exactly what this movie is. Watch it. Seriously, you won’t regret it.

 Locke

Locke_poster Ivan Locke, a dedicated family man and successful construction manager, receives a phone call on the eve of the biggest challenge of his career that sets in motion a series of events that threaten his carefully cultivated existence.

I’ve seen this popping up on my recommended for you tab on Netflix (no prizes for guessing why I suppose) and after some investigation, I discover that this is a film that takes place entirely in one car with one man on a motorway and as I’m struggling a bit with the inner voice of my NANOWRIMO character, I thought it would be a good way of seeing how someone else managed one setting, one character, one voice narration. Also T Hardz.

14th November
Writing whilst watching Locke. Hoping it will give me some inspiration for one setting scenes…. We’ll see
Its your right of way mate…
T Hardz sounds so posh!
Oh wait, no he’s welsh!
OH that is not news you want to hear over the phone! 
“you can’t trust god when it comes to concrete”
You shouldn’t hog the middle lane dude.
How is the cinematography so amazing when the whole thing is set in a car?!
This dude cares far too much about concrete
Well that was intense

Intense is right! I love films that are really limiting in the sense that they have one setting or one character or whatever – there is a great early RDJ film called 2 Girls and a Guy that takes place entirely in his apartment and there is an entire story that takes place, its incredible stuff. This was very much the same, the entire film happens in a car on the motorway and yet there is so much going on! Thanks Netflix recommendations!

Other films I’ve watched recently that didn’t get the twitter treatment were:
What we do in the shadows – which was hilarious! The Incredibles which I watched for the first time recently with my niece, now I’m excited about the up coming sequel even though I feel like I shouldn’t be I don’t have the right! I only discovered it the other day!

Film reviews in 10 tweets or less

Hello dear reader, I hope you’re well?
So, lets get a thing out of the way. I love stories. I don’t care how theyre told, I just really like stories and I like getting meta about stories and while I started this blog to encourage me to start reading again, I think what it has become is a place where I can experience and enjoy stories and then get meta about them, whether they are my stories or someone else’s.
Ya’ll know as this is a blog called the Perks of Being a Bookworm, that I like reading. I also really like films (you can click here for proof on that one) and I came to the realisation the other day, that when I read a book and I really like it, I review it and analyse it and then post it here, when I like a film, I tend to head to twitter and just flail about random moments over there. So, I thought, for the sake of prosperity, that every time I post a tweeted film review, I would then also post it here. Just for you guys. Also because I am clearly a narcissist and can’t deal with posting something only once. (Also because I have seen lots of great films recently – like The Martian for instance and I didn’t actually tell anyone about them.)

Let’s go!

Recently, I rewatched some things I hadn’t watched for ages and I watched something I hadn’t watched before. Let’s see if these three tweeted film reviews make a good enough post to make this a regular feature then, eh?

Rock ‘n’ Rolla

RocknRolla_Poster

 Lenny Cole, a London mob boss, puts the bite on all local real estate transactions. For substantial fees, he’s helping Uri Omovich, a Russian developer. As a sign of good faith, Omovich loans Cole a valuable painting, promptly stolen off Cole’s wall. While Cole’s men, led by the dependable Archie, look for the canvas, three local petty criminals, the Wild Bunch, steal money from the Russian using inside information from his accountant, the lovely Stella. Meanwhile, a local drug-addled rocker, Johnny Quid, is reported drowned, and his connection to Cole is the key to unraveling the deceits and double crosses of life in the underworld.

Something you may not know about me is that I bloody love a London accent. I think its because my family are Londoners. I feel at home with a London accent and sometimes, you need a comfort of a nice homely accent. So I thought to myself, I know, I need to watch a Guy Richie movie. We all know Snatch is awesome and ya’ll know how I feel about Sherlock Holmes and Robert Downey Jr, but Rock n Rolla is one of the most underrated, silly gangster movies ever. All you really need to know about this is its Guy Richie at his best and it is an absolute travesty that the sequel has never seen the light of day.
Also, it features Idris Elba before he got super famous and you know if something has Idris Elba in it, it’s bound to be good. So, what did I inflict on the good people of Twitter when I sat down to watch this?

October 10th
“if a slap don’t work, you cut em or you pay em, but you keep your receipts cos this aint the mafia.”

anyone else miss guy ritchie’s gangster movies? Still praying for a rocknrolla sequel.

Mostly for more mark strong, toby kebbel and my bae, handsome bob.

ya’ll know when i say that what i really mean is i want gerard butler and tom hardy to slow dance again but for longer

Actually, can i have a whole 2 hour long film just about that? Guy Ritchie, can we set up a kickstarter to get this done?

Ahhh what a steller bit of reviewing there. I think this feature is going to work out nicely, don’t you?

Inception

Inception_OST Dom Cobb is a skilled thief, the absolute best in the dangerous art of extraction, stealing valuable secrets from deep within the subconscious during the dream state, when the mind is at its most vulnerable. Cobb’s rare ability has made him a coveted player in this treacherous new world of corporate espionage, but it has also made him an international fugitive and cost him everything he has ever loved. Now Cobb is being offered a chance at redemption. One last job could give him his life back but only if he can accomplish the impossible-inception. Instead of the perfect heist, Cobb and his team of specialists have to pull off the reverse: their task is not to steal an idea but to plant one. If they succeed, it could be the perfect crime. But no amount of careful planning or expertise can prepare the team for the dangerous enemy that seems to predict their every move. An enemy that only Cobb could have seen coming.

Now, I love Inception. It’s one of my absolute faves, just everything about it is incredible, but would you know that from the nonsense I spewed on Twitter. Let’s find out!

October 18th.
Listening to Inception made me want to watch Inception and now I’m remembering all the Arthur/Eames fan fic I used to read

Also makes me want Leo to win an oscar.

Hello Sunday, I would like to watch all the Leo DiCaprio films today please.

Whilst reading all the Arthur/Eames fic. Good times.

I JUST FOUND A FANFIC VIDEO CALLED 500 DAYS OF EAMES. OMG. I DON’T REMEMBER THAT ONE! (if you ever wanted proof that Leah is trash)

Wow. So… Instead of reviewing Inception in easy to read tweets, I talked about what I got up to at university, which was, yes, mostly reading Arthur/Eames fan fic that I found on Tumblr. Good thing that the final film to feature in this post did actually sort of get reviewed over on Twitter…

Child 44

share-final2Based on the first of a trilogy by Tom Rob Smith and set in the Stalin era of the Soviet Union. The plot is about an idealistic pro-Stalin security officer who decides to investigate a series of child murders in a country where supposedly this sort of crime doesn’t exist. The state would not hear of the existence of a child murderer let alone a serial killer. He gets demoted and exiled but decides, with just the help of his wife, to continue pursuing the case.

This film was bloody great. Like I know Gary Oldman is a bit problematic, but he is a damn fine actor. Also T Hardz and Paddy Considine. Brilliant cast, the cinematography made me want to cry and it was all so multi layered and eurgh. I could rave all day about this and rave I did for several minutes.

October 20th

So child 44 is freaking great. Like eurgh i was having nerdgasms at that cinematography

Also t-hardz getting arrested in his matching pjs was great

Like ok its not historically accurate but by god what a complex storyline

And paddy considine was perf. As was noomi rapace. Like dayum gurl you fight the patriarchy! (Or the slimey guy trying to kill your hubby)

Basically its

Now i want an old fashioned news boy hat like they all wore in fifties russia

Wow. Emojis look super weird on wordpress!
So, what do we think. Is this the type of steller content you want to see on this blog, perhaps you think my film related flailings should stay where they are. Either way, I think this was marginally successful. We shall see, we all know I’m not great at creating and then sticking to features over here.

Other films I have watched recently, but didn’t mention on Twitter (like anyone cares) were:
The Martian – seriously, if you make a film about a man stuck on Mars, you put David Bowie’s Life on Mars in the soundtrack, ok? (It featured other Bowie songs, which is what makes this so much worse). Its great, but its hella long. The drama and the pacing is superb though. Even if like me, you can’t take Matt Damon seriously because of Team America.
Shutter Island – a rewatch because I watched Inception and then wanted all the Leo DiCaprio. It’s bloody brilliant, but I still have no idea what the ending line means!
Layer Cake – After Rock n Rolla, I wanted more London gangsters and I’d never seen Layer Cake. I didn’t like it. Mostly because I don’t rate Daniel Craig at all. Also, he is far too posh for all the swears he was throwing around.

(post post writing thought – three of these films are based on books I’ve not read… Should I read them? Let me know if they’re any good. – other thought, four of these films feature T Hardz and two of them feature Leo Di Caprio. Weird. I swear I do watch other actors. Honest. )

“I didn’t know you liked films”

Hello.
I made a short film a couple of months ago called The Infinity Path, it was super fun to make and put together and people have been really nice about it… So then I decided to make another one (its called Lost) and talking to people about the Infinity Path and Lost, I’ve noticed that there is common comment I’ve been getting: “I didn’t know you liked films.”
So, I thought I would address this. See below for proof that I do actually like films.

Day Ten

30 day challenge header

Ten days in and I’m starting to get used to this posting every day thing! Maybe I should do this more often. Or maybe I should keep thoughts like that to myself…

Here are are though, day ten:

Name five absolutely great film adaptations of books.

Now we’re back to the tricky posts. I kind of love films. I used to work in a dvd library and so I watch a lot of films, there is a surprising lack of imagination in Hollywood and pretty much every film you see on the shelves today is based on something else, and most of those films can not even stand up beside the original books, but sometimes you get pleasantly surprised, so here are five film adaptations that are actually a bit good. Where possible I’ve stuck the director of the film in as well as the original books author, but as you’ll see when we get to Mean Girls, I put the films writer in instead, mostly because I can’t not write Mean Girls without adding Tina Fey’s name.

Submarine (book by Joe Dunthorne, film by Richard Ayoade)
I hated the book of Submarine. I found the main character to be completely irritating, he’s so whiny and self obsessed, but despite of this, I wanted to watch the film, mostly due to Richard Ayoade’s general brilliance. The film version of Submarine is great, it’s funny and endearing and film!Oliver is actually relatable. Also, the soundtrack is amazing.

The Princess Bride (book by William Golding, film by Rob Reiner)
Princess Bride the film and Princess Bride the book are pretty much one and then same. If every film adaptation took a leaf out of the Princess Bride’s book they would be well loved.

Mean Girls (book by Rosalind Wiseman – under the title of Queen Bees and Wannabes – film by Tina Fey)
Mean Girls was a book. An actual book, technically a non fiction book but still, that counts as a book and I mean, who doesn’t love Mean Girls?!

The Lord of the Rings (book by J R R Tolkein, film by Peter Jackson)
I love the Lord of the Rings books and films equally, Peter Jackson took Tolkien’s world and made it more accessible to a wider audience and I loved it. The Hobbit, not so much but still…

Scott Pilgrim (book by Bryan Lee O’Malley, film by Edgar Wright)
I’m a huge fan of the way Scott Pilgrim was made, the books are genius, the film is genius. Just like, get them in your life.

Other honourable mentions would have been Matilda, The Wonder Boys, The Hunger Games, Bridget Jones Diary and Perks of Being a Wallflower. Not every film adaptation is awful, in fact some of them are even better than the books they originated from (see Angus Thongs and Perfect Snogging for reference). Tomorrow we get to discuss the worst film adaptations I can think of. And trust me, I can think of a few.